TAKING TIME AND A LIL' YELLOW NUMBER

Summer has challenged me this year in many ways, everyone knows of that constant pressure in summer to have to do things, not waste the sunshine and see your friends. I'm so lucky to have friends  & family all over the place, so I'm able to experience loads of different places and step out of my everyday city every so often. 

But...I was finding myself so run down, upset that     my days off seemed to go in a flash (time flies when  you're having fun right?) and I was having fun, so much fun. The problem became that I literally had no time to breathe, to enjoy or even clean my home or to focus on myself and then tomorrow would come and I'd be back to work. 

I started to get quite down, and my reaction to this was to fill every aspect of my days off and evenings off with seeing my friends, or doing things and I was noticing that I was starting to lose my s**t more often, over the tiniest things! I just couldn't wind down no matter what, I had an inability to say no. I love being sociable but this was another level...I was driving all the time on my own to go to these places, some further than others. 

I was literally leaving myself no time to just relax, my fear being I was waisting my days if I didn't fill them. 

It's amazing what doing nothing can do to your mentality. I've started a new job which is closer to home and even in the first week I've already finished projects that were overdue, and started new ones with friends. I've cleaned my whole house, done my overdue clothes washing...oops, and I've took time for myself for once!

I feel more creative, I feel less like time is slipping away from me and less stressed! Honestly I think sometimes it's taken for granted, just doing nothing for once. 

Summer also forced me to transition from my black jeans to skirts and dresses with no tights and has been a process. Honestly, I'm kinda into it now...I'm trying to learn to love my knobbly knees, and having a tan from holiday helps but I am honestly living for this yellow checked skirt from Topshop.

I love the grunge style but how I can still add colour to my wardrobe which is something I've been trying to do - It's hard when you basically sold your soul to the black skinny jeans hype from the age 14. 

The whole look feels very me, and its so transitional into winter by just adding black tights and a denim or leather jacket which is always a winner. 

So what to take from this post? Not a lot. Except always take some time for yourself and topshop are currently smashing the denim skirt game. 

x

HOW TO | LONG-DISTANT FRIENDSHIPS

I'm sure any adult probably has a long-term friendship, whether you've moved away or they have here's some of my tips on not letting the distance get in the way. 

I have a few long-term friendships and sometimes it can be hard, no more spontaneous nights out every weekend, no more just popping to see them for an hour, it now has to be an event thats planned into your diaries. 

One of my New Years goals in 2018 was to spend more time on my family and friends, I think I'm good at putting aside time for friends and family because whenever I have time off work I can't sit still anyway - but I still wanted to put aside more time regularly to see them. 

It's all a bit of give and take, here and there. You need to put in to expect some back in my opinion - so my first tip is: 

Take Turns:

It's a lot easier, fairer and more fun when you take it in turns to make the effort to visit. Recently my best friend from University moved closer to me for her job, and she actually lives about 30 minutes from where I work (which is still about 1hr 30 from my house). We do this really well, we take turns to see each other and we are both so chill about it. Somehow without making it a thing it became a thing that pretty much naturally we take it in turns to drive or travel to each other. She surprised me on my Birthday with a trip to Birmingham to see me, and then recently last weekend I went to visit her in Leicester! 

Be understanding:

It can be hard to always travel, and sometimes it can be expensive. Be understanding if they can't get it off work, or if they can't afford it. After all they're your friend, and if you mean that much to each other you'll rearrange!

Do something different:

While going on a night out is great and chilling in the house drinking wine and eating 'picky tea' (a tea consisting of various little foods that you eat with your hands - my friends prefer crisps, cheese, bread, nachos yum) a good way of making the visit seem longer and more full is to plan something to do or go. My family have a lovely static caravan in Wales and it is so lovely to go and have time away up there with friends. Me and my friendship group I grew up with went there a while back and made a weekend out of it and now it will always be remembered! 

NO PRESSURE:

Don't put so much pressure on each other to press conversation every day, just because you don't talk as much as you used to when you lived closer doesn't mean your friendship is flaking! You're all busy, tag them in a cheeky meme or two, send them something funny. Instead of just liking their Instagrams message them quickly and ask them about what they did today - but don't be worried if you don't always speak! Chill. 

Have fun:

Self explanatory really... but you don't get much time with these girls (or boys) but have fun. You can have your moan and be natural but just make sure you have fun. Don't waste the time you have because you WILL regret it - trust. Ask them questions about their life, GET OFF YOUR PHONE (Instagram boomerangs of wine dates allowed obvs) but be interested and be completely present! Take photos together and make memories!

I have a fair few of long distant friends so you could call me a professional at this - but honestly these are things i've learnt throughout the years and now I've never been more happier and felt more comfortable with my long-distance friendships. I love them all...but they know that ;)